A Geekster’s Paradise Part 2: The Wheatoning

I will shortly continue my exploration of classic early 1990’s game manuals…shortly. But in the words of Stephen Hawking: You folks gotta’ getcha’ summa’ ‘dis right here*.

So, I’d been waiting for tonight for a while. This evening the LA Kings were battling the Dallas Stars at the same time that Wil Wheaton’s episode of Big Bang Theory was airing on CBS while he was stuck at w00tstock and wow if this sentence was any longer we could market it as a penis extender.

I had prepared Rochto for the battle royale that was going to be the hockey match tweeting, because Wil and I had created a fun sort of back and forth on Twitter for our various teams.

But in the mean time, three things happened. I got caught in a vortex of work banning miscreants, and Wil got caught up in a vortex of how awesome it must be to get to hang out with Adam Savage and Paul and Storm and also be on TV at the same time. And lastly, The Dallas Stars got pummeled, nay *batted about* by the LA Kings.

That’s not to say that I am (I’m not) as most Firefly fans would put it, BITTER. Because in this life we all have our moments which are wonderful. Mine tends to happen every day when I protect the Xbox LIVE service from what I affectionately call "poopheads."  I am indeed, fortunate in my work.

But to get back to the point, during tonight’s episode of Big Bang Theory (a show that I delight in holding close to my geek vest) I was forced to share my treasure with Rochto, an avowed Wil Wheaton fan.

"This is silly" was her judgment.

"Wait," I said, knowing more than I should about the show, "you don’t understand. When the guy starts making fun of his opponent in a card based game like that using Wrath of Khan quotes, that guy is totally me"

Her stare was cold, her words, cutting:

"Yeah I got that.  He kinda made me think that when he said the card game was ‘Kha-an.’"

Not only did Wil Wheaton’s LA Kings destroy my Stars this evening, Big Bang Theory’s…theories…caused my wife to slice my geek heart to the very…bone?

The crushing moment was when I realized, my grandmother still alive is my Meemaw, however there’s no tea party like Wil’s nana’s tea party. **

Wheaton had won.  Geek Wise, Hockey Wise, everything wise. So I made sure I paid special attention to his gamertag.  Oh sure he says "Don’t be a dick", but does he practice, what he preaches?***

*In fairness I only ever heard Hawking say that one time.

** No, really, you gotta see the episode to get that.

*** yeah he does.  Damn it.

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