NOTE: This is a post about sex. It’s not graphic or anything, but consider yourself warned.
I hate the fact that, for the most part in America, violence is fun and exciting and glorified. But sex is shamed and private and embarrassing. One is an abnormal behavior developed out of fear and power over resources which we hope none of us will ever have to engage in. The other is a biological imperative that brings pleasure and (sometimes) more humans and that any reasonable learned psychologist would tell you is one (not the only) pillar to a healthy life.*
Sexual negativity strikes me as incredibly stupid. Parents will turn a blind eye to letting their 12 year old play a violent and realistic combat video game but exposure to anything remotely sexual content-wise is going to be the thing that scars them forever?** If there’s one thing I have learned in my life it’s that most everything people are taught formally about sex and sexuality is wrong or dramatically incomplete. Most of our fiction and education in regards to sex is based on religious or societal archetypes and basic plumbing. It bears very little resemblance to reality, with all its complexities.
A man named Al Vernacchio seems to get this fundamentally, and he starts fixing it with the most basic of premises: our metaphors are all wrong.
Watch this video. I’ll be shocked if you don’t think it’s a great place to start when we think about changing our viewpoints to be more sex positive.
*TRIGGER WARNING. I’m excepting here for the purposes of framing the topic cases of rape or child abuse. I classify all those under violence, not sex. When I talk about sex in this post, I mean consensual amongst those who can give consent.
**The straw man argument here is that I am advocating more sexual content for children. I’m not. I’m saying we’re already glorifying a damaging behavior (violence) that everyone agrees is negative, and demonizing the behavior we all will engage in to lead healthy lives.